Split Hairs
by Major144
Summary: Czar Baldy Bald IV has called upon the aid of a powerful Emperor named Split to destroy Bobobo and his gang. Bobobo must first take on Split's crazy strong generals and their assassin henchmen before he can fight Split.
1. Chapter 1 The Odd Emperor

Split Hairs  
Chapter 1 The Odd Emperor  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Czar Baldy Bald IV sat in his throne his wife the alien Mako-chan stood next to him with her tail sticking into his head and sucking on. A bunch of Hair Hunters stood at attention in the room on either side of his throne. His assistant Octopus Carol came into the throne room.

"What is it?" Asked Baldy Bald.

"My lord Emperor Split as just arrived!" Said Octopus Carol.

That got Baldy Bald's attention, he quickly yanked Mako-chan's tail out of his head.

"Quickly let him in!" He ordered.

"Yes my lord!" Said Octopus Carol as he scuttled away on his tentacles.

"Soldiers take your position!" Order Baldy Bald.

The soldiers quickly raised some welcome banners on either side of the room. The right side had blue banners and the left side had red banners. Octopus Carol came back in.

"Presenting The Lord of Randomtopia Emperor Split!" He shouted as the doors behind him opened.

A couple of soldiers started tossing out rose petals. The ones on the right tossed out white rose petals, while the ones on the left tossed out red rose petals. In strolled Emperor Splits. He was an odd sight to see both the right half and the left half of his body were completely opposite. The skin of his right side was completely white, while his left side had a dark tan. His right shoe was white, while his left shoe was black. The same with his pants and shirt he wore. Splits whore body armor similar Halekulani of the Big Four. The only difference was that the right side of the armor was silver, while the left side was gold. Split's right eye was blue, while his left eye was red. The right side of his hair was a mixture of white, blond, and blue. The left side of his hair was a mixture of black, silver, and red. Split wire a crown that was half silver and half gold.

As Split got closer Baldy Bald stood up from his throne and kneeled before Split.

"Thank you for coming oh might Emperor Split!" Said Baldy Bald.

"You may stand up." Said Split with a commanding voice.

Baldy Bald got back up.

"I've heard you have having trouble with some rebels and according to you they might be worth my time destroying." Said Split.

"Yes they are indeed powerful." Said Baldy Bald as he pulled out a remote and pushed a button.

A giant flat screen TV appeared in the air showing images of Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo, and friends Beauty, Don Patch, Gaser, Jelly Jiggler, Softon, Dengakuman, Hatenko, and Torpedo Girl.

"These are the rebels. They are lead by the man with the blond afro. His name is Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. He is from the hair kingdom and he a master of Fist of the Nose Hair. He and his group have defeated several of by best warriors and the Hair Hunters from a hundred years ago. His also has defeated his older evil older brother and his empire." Said Baldy Bald as he pressed another button on the remote.

The TV then displayed a series of images of Bobobo and his gang defeating various villains.

"Yes they do seem like interesting opponents. Very well I shall destroy these rebels for you." Said Split.

"Is it ok that you give use a demonstration first? Were all fans of your work." Said Baldy Bald.  
Split smiled.

"Why of course, I'm always happy to please the fans. Do you have three people I can demonstrate on?" He asked.

Baldy Bald snapped his fingers and summoned the guards to bring something into the room. They disappeared and came back with three tied up figures. They were The Three Civilizations! First there was the Mesopotamia Civilization, he was a tentacled-horned nose creature. Second was the Indus Civilization, he was a firecracker dressed in ancient Japanese garb. The last one was Yellow River, he was a man with long black hair dressed in ninja gear.

"You may demonstrate your powers on these three." Said Baldy Bald.

"May I asked what they are being punished for?" Asked Split.

"They were put in charge of developing a new security system for all the Hair Hunt bases. Their security system backfired and kicked the soldiers out of the bases and made the bases self destruct!" Said Baldy Bald glaring at the Three Civilizations.

"How was I supposed to know that giving a security system the thought process of a coffee machine and a bomb would make it go caffeine crazy and blow up!" Complained Mesopotamia Civilization.

"Enough!" Ordered Baldy Bald.

Split formed a ball of energy in his hands and formed a sword. The sword had a straight side and a curvy side.

"Super Fist of Splits Chopped Halves!" He said as he sliced Mesopotamia and Indus in half with the straight side of the sword.

Both Mesopotamia and Indus eyes popped out and they screamed! However no blood came out of the two halves of either of them. Splits waved his hands and the right side of Mesopotamia and the left side of Indus fused together. He did the same to Mesopotamia's left side and the right side of Indus fused together. The two new beings looked at their bodies in shock and screamed! They tried to run away but each tripped on their uneven amount of legs. Split turned towards Yellow River.

"Super Fist of Splits Spilt Personality Aspect!" He shouted as he hit Yellow River with the curvy side of the sword.

At first nothing happened then a ball of energy shot out of Yellow River's chest and transformed into another Yellow River wearing an apron and holding a plate of fresh baked cookies.

"Who wants oatmeal cookies!" Said the new Yellow River cheerfully.

"WHAT ARE YOU?!" Screamed Yellow River in shock and fear.

"That is a aspect of your personality. It appears it wants to be a cook." Said Split.

Yellow River just starred in shock as the aspect of his personality handed out cookies to the guards. Baldly Bald clapped.

"That was quite a demonstration. Well done Bobobo and his group will be no match for you!" Declared Baldy Bald.

"Thank you for the praise I'll be on my way as soon as I fix this." Said Split as he snapped his fingers.

The Three Civilizations started glowing and in a flash of light Mesopotamia and Indus were back to normal and the personality aspect of Yellow River disappeared. All Three Civilizations were in the fetal position sucking their thumbs. Split laughed a left the throne room. Baldy Bald looked at the TV screen and grinned wickedly at the image of Bobobo.

"Soon you will no longer be a hairy thorn in my side and the Chrome Dome empire will rule the world!" He laughed wickedly.

To be continued.


	2. Chapter 2 Going to Randomtopia

Split Hairs  
Chapter 2 Going to Randomtopia  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Bobobo and his gang had just decided to stop and camp in the woods. Softon and Hatenko had wonder off to go collect some fire wood. Dawn Patch was at a nearby river with a fishing pole trying to catch some fish by using Jelly Jiggler and Dengakuman as bait. The two were in the water wearing life jackets, with a rope tied to them, and wearing head bands with the words bait on them.

"Come on you two, will never catch any fish with you just floating there! Thrash around a little!" Shouted Dawn Patch with annoyance.

Jelly Jiggler and Dengakuman put on some one piece female swimsuits and started doing some synchronize swimming. Dawn Patch, Beauty, and Gaser watched them preform. Jelly Jiggler and Dengakuman swam in circles. They dove in the water and stuck their feet in the air and kicked them. Then the legs disappeared under the water and the two of them popped out of the water wearing wings on their arms and fake beaks on their faces.

"We are swans!" They shouted as they struck a dramatic pose in the water.

Dawn Patch, Beauty, and Gaser clapped and cheered. Then they pulled out some score boards. Beauty and Gaser gave the performance a 10. Dawn Patch gave them a 9.5 and a pineapple.

Suddenly a shark appeared behind Jelly Jiggler and Dengakuman and grabbed the in it's jaws and took them under the water! Dawn Patch, Beauty, and Gaser's eyes poped out and they screamed in shock.

"WHAT'S A SHARK DOING IN A RIVER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WOODS?!" Screamed Beauty.

Gaser noticed that the rope to the fishing line was being dragged! He turned to Dawn Patch who was still holding the fishing pole.

"Quick Dawn Patch, let go of the fishing pole before you get dragged in!" He shouted to his orange companion.  
Dawn Patch looked at Gaser with sadness in his eyes.

"I can't! I super glued the pole to my hands!" He wailed.

"Why would you do that?!" Shouted Gaser.

"I rented the fishing pole and I didn't want to lose it, so I super glued it to my hands!" Explained Dawn Patch. "In hindsight this probably that was probably a terrible ideaaaaa!" Shouted Dawn Patch as he was dragged into the river.

"Dawn Patch no!" Shouted Beauty.

At that moment Bobobo showed up.

"What's with all the ruckus?" He asked.

"Mr. Bobobo Dawn Patch was fishing using Jelly Jiggler and Dengakuman as bait, when a shark suddenly appeared and grabbed Jelly Jiggler and Dengakuman! Then Dawn Patch got dragged in because he super glued the fishing pole to his hands!' Explained Gaser.

"That sounds like something that would happen to them. Don't you worry I'll call in a special rescue party!" Said Bobobo as a radio antenna popped out of his afro and a compartment with a radio opened up in his chest.  
He grabbed the radio.

"Hello this is search and rescue. How can we help you?" Said a female voice.

"Yes I have a code Zing Zag Yankee Do Du with fish sticks." Replied Bobobo.

"WHAT KIND OF CODE IS THAT?!" Shouted Beauty.

"Got it! Your friend was using two of your other friends as bait. Then a shark grabbed them and dragged the guy who was fishing because he super glued his hands to the fishing pole. Don't worry will send some one right away." Said the women on the other line.

"THATS INCREDIBLE ACCURATE!" Shouted Gaser.

Bobobo put the radio back in his chest and closed the compartment.

"Now all we have to do is wait." He said.

The three of them watched the water. Suddenly it started to bubble and then it shot op like a geyser! They all watched in amazement as Torpedo Girl appeared at the top of the geyser carrying the shark which had a bunch of lumps on it's head and still had Jelly Jiggler and Dengakuman in it's mouth! The shark was dragging Dawn Patch whose hands were still super glued to the pole! Torpedo Girl had a rope clinched in her teeth which was dragging a large net full of fish!

"TORPEDO GIRL IS THE RESCUE PARTY!" Shouted Beauty.

Torpedo Girl landed on the ground dropping the shark, the net full of fish, Jelky Jiggler, Dengakuman, and Dawn Patch on the ground. She walked over to the shark and pried it's jaws open freeing Jelly Jiggler and Dengakuman. She then gave the shark a kick sending it flying back into the river!

"Back to Davy Jones Locker with you!" She shouted as she made a pose. "I'm the best at what I do because I'm a Torpedo!" She shouted proudly.

Bobobo steeped forward dressed as a marine admiral.

"Thank you Miss Torpedo! Your country thanks you for you valuable services! You not only rescued these men, but provided us with rations for our troops! I'm proud to give you this medal as a token of our appreciation!" Said Bobobo as he gave Torpedo Girl a smily face sticker that said number 1 on it.

"THATS JUST A STICKER!" Shouted Beauty.

Tears leaked out of Torpedo Girls eyes as she took the sticker and placed it in the middle of her forehead.

"Thank you sir!" She shouted as she saluted Bobobo.

Bobobo returned the salute.

After that was over with Softon and Hatenko returned with the fire wood. They cooked the fish and had dinner. After dinner things were winding down everybody was just laying around and resting. Unbeknownst to them they were being watched. Spilt floated above several feet above their camp floating upside down.

"I believe it's high time I go introduce myself to my new enemies." He thought as he hovered down.

Beauty just happened to be looking up and she saw Split.

"Who is that?!" She shouted getting everyone's attention.  
They all looked at Split in shock as he flipped himself right ways and landed on his feet in the middle of the camp.

"Hello there my name is Split. I'm the emperor of Randomtopia. I've come here to destroy you." Said Spilt casually.

Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler looked at Split then burst out laughing.

"Yeah like your going to destroy all of use!" Laughed Jelly Jiggler.

"You think we're scared of you? You look like some dumb cosplayer at an anime convention!" Laughed Dawn Patch.

Spilt faced the two of them he raised one of his fingers and it started glowing.

"Super Fist of Splits Silent Slice!" He said as he waved his finger in the air at Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler.

At first nothing happen. Then Jelly Jiggler burst into a million jelly cubes and fell to the ground! All the spikes on Dawn Patch's body fell off! Dawn Patch starred in shock at his spikes and the pile of little blue cubes that had once been Jelly Jiggler. He gritted his teeth and pulled out his green onion sword.

"How dare you! I'm going to give you such a wiping that you won't be able to sit down for months!" He shouted as he leaped at Split.

Split just raised his hand and stuck his pinky out.

"Super Fist of Matter Pinky Power Push!" He said as his pinky grew to an enormous size.

The giant pinky slammed into Dawn Patch and sent him flying into a large rock. He fell to the ground with stars and little Bobobos wearing angle wings circled his head.

"But... Mommy..I don't want to go...to school...I want to watch paint dry." Muttered Dawn Patch.

Gaser glared at Split.

"How dare you hurt my friends! Take this!" He shouted as he pulled out a fart ball from his butt and threw it at Split.

The fart ball raced towards Spilt, but then got split into two and went around him and exploded against some trees. Gaser gasped in shock. Split just smiled. Softon, Hatenko, and Torpedo Girl rushed towards Spilt. The villain just raised his hand and clenched his fist.

"Super Fist of Matter Gravity Shift!" He said.

All at once Softon, Hatenko, and Torpedo Girl fell to the ground screaming in pain as if something huge had just landed on top of them.

"I can't move!" Shouted Softon.

"Same here!" Shouted Hatenko.

"My thrusters aren't working!" Shouted Torpedo Girl.

Spilt looked around at the down group looking for Bobobo.

"Where did Bobobo run off to?" He wondered.

Suddenly the ground in front of him burst open and out jumped Bobobo dressed as a mole!

"Super Fist of the Nose Hair Digging Mole Surprise Attack!" Shouted Bobobo as he punched Split in the face!

"WHAT A LONG NAME FOR A ATTACK!" Shouted Beauty.

Spilt staggered back a little a small bruise forming on his face. He smiled at Bobobo.

"Very impressive you managed to catch me off guard! Well done! This will prove to be an interesting fight!" Said Split.

"Enough jibber jabber! Your attacked and hurt my friends! I'm taking you down!" Shouted Bobobo.

"Yeah go get him Bobobo!" Shouted Jelly Jiggler who was back in one piece.

"Show whose the main character around here! It's me!" Shouted Dawn Patch who had all his spikes back.

"Sounds good, but I feel kind of bad for taking all the fun of fighting you. I have all these minions back home at Randomtopia. It wouldn't be fair for them if I had all the fun fighting you all." Said Split.

"What's your point?" Asked Bobobo.

"My point is this. I'm going to take you to Randomtopia where you must defeat my six best warriors The Splinter Six and their troops. If you beat them then can you fight me. So how about it do we have a deal?" Said Split.

"Fine doesn't matter to me! I kick The Splinter Six butt as an appetizer, and then kick your butt as the main course!" Shouted Bobobo.

"Very good!" Said Spilt as he snapped his fingers.

Softon, Hatenko and Torpedo Girl found themselves able to stand again. Split' formed a ball of energy into a sword he swiped the straight side at the air.

"Super Fist of Splits Splitting Time and Space!" He said as a giant portal appeared in the sky.

A giant worm with bird wings flew out of the portal.

"A WORM JUST CAME OUT OF THE WORMHOLE!" Shouted Beauty.

The rebels just starred in amazement as the worm landed in front of them.

"Hop aboard!" Said Split.

Everyone started heading towards the worm. Spilt raised his hand and stopped Bobobo, Dawn Patch, Jelly Jiggler, and Torpedo Girl.

"Just one more thing before you go." He said as he raised his sword and sliced the hour heroes with curvy side of his sword! Super Fist of Splits Spilt Personality Aspect!" He shouted.

At first nothing happened the a ball of energy leaped from the hour heroes chest. The ball of energy from Dawn Patch transformed into Professional Patch! The ball of energy from Jelly Jiggler transformed into the Jelly Jiggler Karate Master from Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo episode 45! The ball of energy from Bobobo transformed into Bobobo From a Parallel Universe Kind of Like His Alter Ego from Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo episode 25! The ball of energy from Torpedo Girl transformed into Over! The heroes starred in shock at their personality aspects. The personality aspects starred at their counterparts in equal shock.

"Are you me?" Asked Over in confusion as he looked at Torpedo Girl.

"Yes." Said Torpedo Girl equally confused.

The Karate Master Jelly Jiggler shook his beaded nu necklace in the air.

"I sense bad magic and ne in the air." He said.

Professional Patch cracked his knuckles.

"Something is seriously amiss here. I need to get series to figure out what it is and fix it." He said.

Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler just stared at their counter parts mouth open wide. Bobobo starred at his counterpart.

"What should I call you. Your name is to long and time consuming to pronounce." He said.

The other Bobobo thought for a moment.

"You can call me Parallel Bobobo." He said.

"Sounds good to me." Said Bobobo as he turned to face Split. "Just what did you do to use?!" He demanded.

"I brought an aspect of your personality out. I thought it would make the battles a little bit more amusing. Have a nice trip." Said Split as he smiled and disappeared.

Bobobo sighed and turned to everyone.

"Ok everybody lets get on the worm." He said.

Everybody hopped on the worm. It took off and flew into the portal and disappeared.

To be continued.


	3. Chapter 3 Arriving at Randomtopia

Split Hairs  
Chapter 3 Arriving at Randomtopia  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

The worm had a bunch of seats on it like an airplane where everybody could sit comfortably. Bobobo and the gang traveled through time in space. Bobobo, Dawn Patch, Jelly Jiggler, and Torpedo Girl hung out with their personality aspects. Jelly Jiggler was talking to his kung fu counter part who he decided to name Master Jelly. At first Master Jelly ignored Jelly Jiggler, but then Jelly Jiggler talked about his lucky Nu hanky. Master Jelly also had a deep love for Nu. The two of them talked a little bit about their love for Nu and showed off various Nu items. Master Jelly was showing Jelly Jiggler his Nu glasses, while Jelly Jiggler showed off his Nu cuff links.

Eventually they got board of talking and showing off. Jelly Jiggler looked to see what his friends were up to. He saw Dawn Patch getting into some kind of argument with Professional Patch.

"What do you mean you don't think I have the qualities to be the main character of this series?!" Shouted Dawn Patch.

"We'll for starters the anime and the manga are both called Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. As for you being a main character you just don't take things serious. Your rarely serious so people will never take you seriously as a character much less as the main character." Professional Patch pointed out logically.

Dawn Patch put on some lipstick and a blond wig and began sobbing.

"I can't believe you would be so hurtful!" He cried.

Professional Patch gave Dawn Patch a tissue and a pat on the back.

"There. There. It's all right. I take you seriously. Soon you will spread your wings and sore into the sky of main character stardom. You just have to be more serious." Said Professional Patch.

Dawn Patch had a big chin and strong manly features.

"Your right. I must be serious! He shouted as he pumped his fist in the air.

"That guy has self esteem issues." Muttered Jelly Jiggler.

He looked over and saw Bobobo playing Battleship with Parallel Bobobo. They were both dressed up as marine admirals.

"B7." Said Bobobo.

Parallel Bobobo gasped.

"Oh no! You sank my last battleship!" He shouted.

A geyser of water shot out of the game board and hit Parallel Bobobo knocking him out of his chair. He laid on the ground waving a tiny white flag.

"I surrender!" He shouted.

Bobobo's afro popped open revealing a bunch of tiny sailors who started cheering and dancing.

"Why to go Admiral Bobobo!" They shouted as Bobobo stood up and started dancing.

Jelly Jiggler got board and looked to see what Torpedo Girl and Over were up to. He saw them standing in front of a rollaway chalk board. On the top of the chalk board were the words "OPERATION DESTROY THE ANNOYING JELLY MAN!". Below the words Torpedo Girl and Over were drawing various pictures of Jelly Jiggler in various states of receiving pain. There were pictures of Jelly Jiggler being smashed by Torpedo Girl and pictures of him be slashed to pieces by Over. Both Torpedo Girl and Over had evil cruel looks on their faces. Torpedo Girl cracked her knuckles. Over licked his scissor sword. Jelly Jiggler whimpered and went into the fetal position.

"I'm doomed! Those two have it out for me!" Sobbed Jelly Jiggler to himself.

Elsewhere Spilt was sitting in a throne made out various materials. Half the throne was metal and half the throne was wood. Split was sipping a drink of half red wine half white wine. Six figures stood before him. The figures wore a clocks that were half white half black. They each wore a mask that was half smiling half frowning. They were the Splinter Six.

"Bobobo and his gang will be arriving shortly. I want you six to make sure he has a good time. Do whatever you wish you want them." Said Spilt.

"Yes sir!" Said the Splinter Six as they teleported away.

Spilt just smiled and sipped his wine.

About an hour latter the worm came out of the wormhole. Everybody looked around at their surroundings. They saw a large island that seemed to be made out various sections. Their was a large city, a large beach, a large snowy area with a bunch of casinos, a volcano area with a bunch of hot springs, and a large Japanese village and castle. In the center of the island there was a large floating castle that looked like it was half Japanese castle and half English castle.

"Why talk about an amazing place! How are we supposed to find these Splinter Six guys anyway?" Said Beauty.

"Doesn't matter, will just ask around and search." Said Bobobo.

The worm landed in the city and dropped off Bobobo and the gang, before flying off and disappearing. The heroes made their way down the street. The city was full of strange people. There were half man half animal people walking around and shopping. There were people with food for heads selling life insurance and giant talking lego people playing instruments and dancing. As the heroes looked around they failed to notice three shadowy figures following them.

"This is my kind of place." Said Bobobo.

They were just passing the patio of a coffee shop when they heard someone call the.

"Hey Bobobo!" Cried a female voice.

Everybody turned shock to see Rem, Lambada, and Not Nice Ice Cream sitting at a table drinking coffee.

"What are you guys doing here?" Said Dawn Patch.

"They must be here for revenge!" Shouted Jelly Jiggler.

"Get them!" Shouted Dawn Patch as he pulled out his onion sword in one hand and a churro in his other and charged.

Lambada simply raised one of his legs and slammed into it.

"You can relax were not here to fight." Said Lambada.

"We're on vacation." Said Rem.

"You on vacation!" Said Jelly Jiggler with shock.

"We are." Said Not Nice Ice Cream.

"In fact we've seen a bunch of people from the Chrome Dome Empire walking about. Bad Bard was hanging with us then he ran off saying he had business at the library." Said Rem.

"That's odd. Hey we just got here is there a place we can get a map or something?" Said Bobobo.

"I think I saw a information booth in that tattoo parlor over there." Said Lambada pointing to a large building with a sign that read Tattoos.

"Thanks." Said Bobobo as he and the others headed towards the tattoo parlor and went inside.  
The three shadowy figures who had been following Bobobo peaked out from behind a street corner. They looked at Lambada, Rem, and Not Nice Ice Cream.

"Those fools had walked right into the bosses trap. Lets destroy those three and join him." Said one of the figures.

The other two nodded in agreement and they stared heading towards the three vacationers.

To be continued.


	4. Chapter 4 Battle For Vacation

Split Hairs  
Chapter 4 Battle For Vacation  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Lambada, Rem, and Not Nice Ice Cream were sipping their coffee. Lambada looking at a map of the island and was trying to decide where they should go next on their vacation. Suddenly Lambada felt like some one was watching him and his friends he looked up from the map and saw three figures heading their way. The first person was a men wearing a coat with a bunch of long red and blue scarfs. He had on a brown hair with a black hat. The second figure had a dark blue hoodie he had blue hair. The third figure had on tennis shoes, shorts, a flower T-shirt and a fanny pack. He had blond hair. The three figures walked up to the table.

"Hi there." Said the man with the scarfs. "My name is Sid and these are my comrades Hoods and Fanny." He said indicating his two comrades.

"Pleasure to meet you." Said Hoods bowing his hooded head.

"Howdy." Said Fanny as he stuck his hands in his fanny pact.

"Hello." Said Rim and Not Nice Ice Cream.

Lambada just nodded at the three new comers. He was getting a bad vibe from them. Suddenly Sid stepped forward with one of his scarfs in his hands the scarf turned into a sharp metal blade and slashed down towards Rem! Lambada leaped in front of Rim and brought one of his arms forward!

"Super Fist of Polygons Polygon Lance!" He shouted as a bunch of polygons formed around his arm and into a lance.

He blocked the metal scarf! Sid stepped back and glared at Lambada.

"I was hopping to finish you guys off quickly so we could join our boss in destroying Bobobo and his." Sid said with annoyance.

"Whose your boss? Is he one of those Splinter Six guys I heard about from the brochure?" Asked Lambada.

"We ain't going to tell you nothing." Said Fanny as he cracked his knuckles.

"Looks like were going to have to beat the information out of these nuts." Said Not Nice Ice Cream.

Rem's eyes and aura were blazing!

"We're just sitting here minding our own business enjoying our hard earned vacation and you three just come on over here and start attacking us! That does it! I'm going to give you the worst sleep you've ever had!" She roared.

Lambada and Not Nice Ice Cream back away nervously from Rem's furry!

"Sleep Touch!" She shouted as she jabbed Sid's shoulder!

Immediately Sid's arm fell uselessly to his side! He starred at his arm in horror and then he glared angrily at Rem.

"You'll pay for that! Super Fist of the Scarf Tentacle Arm Scarf!" He shouted as the scarfs around his neck grew and shot out like tentacles!

Rem quickly jumped out of the way to avoid being hit! Hoods leaped forward to aid his comrade.

"Super Fist of the Hoodie Hood Hornets!" He shouted as a swarm of hornets came buzzing out of his hoodie!

The swarm of hornets headed towards Rem, but then caught the sweat scent of Not Nice Ice Cream and headed his way instead! The hornets flew around the unfortunate ice cream bowl and went for his sweat contents!

"Aw get away from my sweetness you flying pest!" He screamed as he desperately swatted at the invading insects.

This only promoted to anger the hornets. The bugs started stinging Not Nice Ice Cream like crazy! In a matter of minutes the ice cream bowl was covered in swellings! Rem quickly stepped forward to help her friend.

"Sleep Powder!" She shouted as a glittering golden powder leaped from her body and cover her comrade and the hornets!

The hornets fell to the ground asleep. Not Nice Ice Cream stumbled around in a daze. Hoods glared at Rem.

"Not bad, but lets see how you handle this! Super Fist of the Hoodie Hood Hog!" Shouted Hoods as an enormous wild hog with tusk leaped out of his hood and charged!

"WHERE DOES HE KEEP GETING THESE THINGS?!" Shouted Not Nice Ice Cream.

"There is another dimension in my hoodie that I can open inside when ever I use my super fist." Said Hoods with a smirk.

The wild hog charged forward! Rem Calmly stood her ground

"Cheap, Sleep, Sheep!" She shouted as a heard of sheep appeared behind her.

The sheep charged forward at the hog! The two forces met in a loud clash of hair and wool! The hog squealed and charged it's way through several waves of sheep, but more sheep jumped onto the hog and buried it underneath a mountain of wool!

"My hog!" Screamed Hoods.

Not Nice Ice Cream suddenly appeared behind Hoods.

"Ice is Nice!" Said Not Nice Ice Cream as a pile of ice cubes appeared in his hands.

He grabbed Hood's hoodie and yanked it back off his head! The bowl of ice cream put the ice cubes in the hoodie and then put it back on Hoods head! The ice cubes went down Hoods shirt and down his back!

"Awwwww! Cold!" Shouted Hoods as he ran around in a circle!

He crashed into a street pole and managed to get the ice out of his clothes. He stood up and saw Rem holding an enormous ball of sleep powder!

"Dragon Sleep Powder!" She shouted as she threw the ball of sleep powder at Hoods!

Hoods screamed in fear and tried to run away, but it was to late! The ball slammed into him and sent him crashing to the ground! He laid on the ground snoring.

Fanny let out an angry yell!

"How dare you do that to Hoods! Super Fist of the Fanny Pack Plastic Baggie Capture!" He shouted as two plastic baggies flew from his fanny pack.

The baggies enveloped Rem and Not Nice Ice Cream and captured them! The two of them punched against their plastic prisons, but they could not break free! Lambada glared at Fanny.

"Release them at once and I'll go easy on you!" He shouted.

"Never! I'll finish you off with my next attack! Super Fist of the Fanny Pack Junk Meteor Shower!" Shouted Fanny as various items shot out of his fanny pack.

There were pen, pencils, lose change, binoculars, flash lights, cameras, maps, sun glasses, and bags of trail mix. The items raced towards Lambada! He just smirked.

"Diamond Daggers!" He shouted.

Immediately giant metal daggers started raining from the sky! They crushed all of Fanny's flying objects and ripped threw the plastic bag prisons that were holding Lambada's friends. Fanny stepped make nervously shanking in shock.

"No way man that was my ultimate attack!" He shouted in disbelief.

Lambada pointed at the sky.

"Polygon Crusher!" He said as he formed an enormous block of polygons over Fanny's head.

Fanny looked up in shock. He screamed as the giant block of polygons fell on top of him! The block hit the ground with a loud thud. Lambada made it disappear. Fanny was laying on the the ground unconscious.

Suddenly Lambada felt something grab his waist and his left arm! He looked down to see a bright red scarf wrapped around his waist and his arm. He looked behind him and saw Sid grinning wickedly at him. Sid lifted Lambada up with his scarf and slams him into the ground! Lambada screamed in pain. Sid laughed evilly.

"I'm going to crush you and your friends and when I'm done with that I'll join my boss in crushing Bobobo!" Laughed Sid as he lifted Lambada up into the air again.

Lambada quickly went into action.

"Polygon Lance!" He shouted as he formed the weapon with his right hand.

He sliced the scarf that was holding him and he dropped to the ground.

"My beautiful scarf! That was a gift from my mother! That tears it! Super Fist of Scarfs Super Scarf Serpent!" Shouted Sid.

The scarfs slid off his neck and started wrapping around one another forming a mass and growing. Soon the scarfs were one massive long multicolored body with a snake head! The giant snake charged forward! Lambada slammed the palms of his hands to the ground!

"Wicked Polygon Prince of the Dark!" Of dark he shouted as he formed a giant demonic creature out of polygons welding a scythe.

The two monsters charged forward! The polygon monster slammed one it's fist into the scarf serpent! A polygon pattern started appearing on the scarf serpent's body! The polygon monster swung his scythe at the scarf snake and made it explode into a million polygons!

"My ultimate attack has been trounced!" Shouted Sid in shock and horror.

The polygon monster charged forward and sent Sid flying into a wall with a powerful punch! Sid fell to the ground unconscious. Lambada was joined by Rem and Not Nice Ice Cream.

"We'll that takes care of that." Said Lambada as he dusted himself off.

He starred at the tattoo parlor wondering who Bobobo and the others were fighting.

To be continued.


	5. Chapter 5 Tattoo Terror

Split Hairs  
Chapter 5 Tattoo Terror  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Bobobo and his friends entered the tattoo parlor. They went down a hallway and found themselves in a large room.

"That's weird. How can such a large room be in such a small building?" Wondered Gaser.

They all looked around the room when they noticed a large bald man sitting in a tattoo parlor chair giving himself a tattoo of a skull. He had a tattoo of a grinning skull on his forehead. He wore blue jeans and a white tank top. There were tattoos all over his body. He finished up his tattoo and stood up and faced the rebels.

"The names Tat and I'm the owner of the tattoo parlor and I've been sent to destroy you all!" He said.

Everybody tensed up.

"Are you one of the Splinter Six?!" Demanded Bobobo.

"I'll only tell you if you beat me." Said Tat as he took off his shirt displaying all his tattoos.  
Everybody gasped. There was a huge collection of tattoos all over Tat's body. There were skulls, bats, spiders, scorpions, guns, lasers, knives, swords, axes, bombs, tigers, a dragon, a race car, and a bunch of ex-girlfriends!

"Impressive ain't it. Let me show you one of my favorites." He said as he lifted up his right arm.

Underneath his armpit their was a list titled VICTIMS in bright red ink. Underneath the title was a long list of names.

"This is a list of all the people I've destroyed. Your all fixing to be on this list!" Laughed Tat.

"How horrible!" Said Beauty with fright.

"You sick twisted freak!" Said Gaser as he clinched his fist angrily.

"Whatever! Doesn't matter what you think my tattoos are art especially this list! When I release my Super Fist your all going to be dead meat!" Said Tat.

"Were not afraid of you!" Shouted Dawn Patch, who was hiding behind Bobobo.

"Yeah!" Shouted Jelly Jiggler, who was also hiding behind Bobobo.

"TALK ABOUT COWARDICE!" Shouted Beauty.

Tat stepped forward and launched his attack.

"Super Fist of the Tattoo Flying Blades!" He shouted as all the tattoos of bladed weapons flew off his body became solid and flew at Bobobo!

Bobobo turned around and gave Jelly Jiggler a cold stare and smiled wickedly.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Asked Jelly Jiggler nervously.

Bobobo grabbed him and forced his mouth open! Bobobo's afro popped opened and a ice machine poked out. It immediately started shooting ice into Jelly Jiggler's open mouth! The poor jelly man screamed in protest as the ice went down his throat. In a matter of seconds his body was frozen solid! Bobobo picked him up.

"Behold my frozen jelly shield!" Shouted Bobobo as he raised the improvised frozen shield in front of himself.

"THATS COLD!" Shouted Beauty.

The blades charged forward! Bobobo expertly fended them off by waving the frozen Jelly Jiggler at them! The blades flew back to Tat and turned back into tattoos on his body.

"I expertly fended off your attack with out any harm coming to me and my friends." Said Bobobo as he held his make shift shield.

The shield suddenly shattered into a million pieces! Bobobo just starred at his destroyed shield dumbfounded.

"Ops!" He said shrugging his shoulder.

"JELLY JIGGLER! NOOO!" Shouted Gaser.

"TALK ABOUT GOING TO PIECES!" Shouted Beauty.

"Quick maybe we can put him back together!" Shouted Dawn Patch as he and Bobobo jumped onto the ground and started collecting the pieces.

Master Jelly joined them.

"I'll help. His my counterpart I know how to put him back together." He said.

Tat just watched them all confused.

"Man those guys are weird. He thought.

Soon they had Jelly Jiggler back together. Except some how both his eyes were on his legs, his nose was on his chest, and his mouth was on his left arm.

"What did you guys do to me?!" Shouted a distressed Jelly Jiggler.

"Don't worry will fix you!" Shouted Master Jelly as he and the others went to work fixing everything.

"This is seriously messed up." Said Professional Patch.

Everybody else nodded in agreement. Soon Jelly Jiggler was back to normal. Bobobo faced Tat.

"You'll pay for what you did to my friend!" He shouted.

"Your the one that hurt him!" Shouted Tat.

"Oh guess your right." Said Bobobo with a dumb smile on his face.

Tat just looked at him in shock. The veins on his forehead twitched.

"That does it! Super Fist of the Tattoo Tattoo Storm!" He shouted as most of the tattoos on his body shot off, became real and charged forward!

Softon and Master Jelly used their karate skills to deflect several flying blades with their bare fist! Professional Patch deflected a bunch of flying blades with a few swift waves of his hand.  
A swarm of bats flew at Bobobo and Parallel Bobobo! The two afro men's hair popped open and two men wearing beekeeper uniforms and welding smokers! The beekeepers sprayed the on rushing bats and knocked them out of the air.

"Luckily we switched to using garlic spray to help deal with the vampires." Said one beekeeper.

"Yep." Said the other.

They went back into their afros.

Hatenko and Torpedo Girl found themselves surrounded by a bunch of evil ex-girlfriends welding swords.

"You can't beat us!" Shouted one of the ex-girlfriends.

Torpedo Girl just scoffed.

"Lets show these chumps what happens when they mess with use." She said.

"Alright." Said Hatenko.

Torpedo Girl grabbed Hatenko and charged towards the ex-girlfriends! Hatenko pulled out his magic key.

"Combine Attack Low Altitude Lock On!" They shouted as they flew at the enemy and Hatenko shoved his magic key into each and every enemies chest!

The ex-girlfriends screamed in pain and turned to stone!

Over faced off against a sword welding ex-girlfriend riding on a tiger.

"Crush him mister Fluffy!" Shouted the ex-girlfriend as they charged forward!

"I'm going to enjoy cut all this hair." Said Over with an evil grin as he charged forward!

There were several slashing sounds and Over and his opponents stood on other sides of the room. Neither seemed to be hurt, suddenly all the hair on the ex-girlfriend's hair fell out along with all the trigger's fur! Both fell to the ground unconscious.

"That was fun." Said Over as he licked his scissors.

Elsewhere Gaser was throwing his farts and knocking out some tigers, while protecting Beauty.

Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler were running about crushing a bunch of snakes, skulls, spiders, and scorpions with some wooden mallets. Jelly Jiggler had his mallet raised to crush a spider, when suddenly a snake shot forward and bit his foot! Jelly Jiggler dropped his mallet and screamed in pain. The mallet ended up hitting Dawn Patch in the head leaving a large lump. Dawn Patch turned around and glared at Jelly Jiggler.

"You jerk!" He shouted as he leaped upon Jelly Jiggler and the two of them started fighting.

Tat suddenly appeared from behind them. He grinned evilly and slammed his fist into the both of them! The two heroes went flying into a wall! Tat charged at Bobobo, who slamming some skulls together. Tat threw a punch and slammed it into Bobobo's gut! Bobobo doubled over. Tat closed in for the kill, when a giant boxing glove shot out of Bobobo's afro and sent him flying! Tat flew into a wall. He staggered to his feet and looked around. He saw that his tattoos were losing Bobobo stepped forward and cracked his knuckles.

"So you want to fight me for real?" He asked.

Tat just smiled and laughed insanely! He called back all his tattoos to appear back on his body.

"You fool that punch I hit you with helped sealed your fate! Now I will show you one of my strongest attacks!" He said.

Everybody watched in amazement as Tat's right arm morphed into a giant tattoo needle. He then made his tattoos give him a clear spot of skin on his left arm. He started drawing up three new tattoos. Soon he had created at tattoo of Bobobo, Dawn Patch, and Jelly Jiggler!

"Super Fist of the Tattoo Tattoo Double Ganger!" Shouted Tats as the three tattoos flew off his body and turned real!

Everybody just starred in shock!

"Prepare to meet your end at the hands of your doubles!" Laughed Tat.

To be continued.


	6. Chapter 6 Tattoo Takedown

Split Hairs  
Chapter 6 Tattoo Takedown  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Bobobo and the group looked at Tat's tattoo doubles.

"I can't believe it." Muttered Beauty.

"I know I can't believe my double is so gorgeous! Finally I have someone who has to suffer the same cures as I for looking beautiful!" Said Dawn Patch with joy.

"Get serious! That's a double ganger created by the enemy to destroy us!" Said Professional Patch as he slapped Dawn Patch in the back of the head.

"Ouch! Ok I'll get serious!" Complained Dawn Patch as he rubbed the back of his head.

Jelly Jiggler was admiring his double ganger.

"Man I'm one handsome devil." He said.

Bobobo slapped both Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler.

"Enough admiring yourselves! It's time to fight! Alright Tat will show you how powerful the original is to you cruddy copies!" He shouted as he Dawn Patch, and Jelly Jiggler charged forward.

"Go tattoo double gangers!" Shouted Tat as his tattoo minions charged forward.

Both sides met with a furry of blows!

"Taste the awesome furry of my blade!" Shouted Dawn Patch as he pulled out his green onion sword and swung it at his double ganger!

The double ganger pulled out it's own green onion sword and countered the blow from Dawn Patch! Dawn Patch leapt away from his double ganger not knowing what to do.

Jelly Jiggler charged at his double ganger wearing his lucky hankies on his arms as if they were boxing gloves. He threw a punch at his double ganger only for the double ganger to preform the same move and counter him. Jelly Jiggler leaped back in fright unsure of what to do.

Bobobo shot his nose hair at his double ganger. The double ganger countered with it's own nose hair! Bobobo threw a punch at the double ganger. The double ganger countered with it's own punch! Bobobo leaped away from his double ganger.

"Drat it's like having a staring contest with your own reflection!" He shouted angrily.

"Ha! Give it up you fools those tattoos know all your moves! Any move you do they can easily counter!" Laughed Tat.  
Bobobo looked his comrades then back at the double gangers.

"Guys we have to change dance partners! We can't attack our own double ganger because they know our moves." Said Bobobo.

Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler nodded in understanding. Then an evil look appeared in their eyes.

"I want to fight Bobobo!" Declared Dawn Patch.

"Hey no fair I want to fight Bobobo!" Shouted Jelly Jiggler.

The two started to get in an argument when Bobobo came in and punched the two of them.

"That's enough! You can both fight my double ganger! I'll take care of those two weaklings!" Declared Bobobo.

"Fine." Said Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler as they rubbed their heads.

"Lets go!" Shouted Bobobo as moose antlers sprouted from the side of his afro and he charged forward!

"TALK ABOUT GOING WILD!" Shouted Beauty.

Bobobo rammed the two double gangers of Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler and sent them flying into the air! He shot his nose hairs at them and grabbed the flying enemies! He slammed them together and then slammed them into the ground! Bobobo took off his clothes revealing wrestling tights!

"TALK ABOUT A QUICK CHANGE OF FASION!" Shouted Beauty.

Bobobo leaped into the air!

"Super Fist of the Nose Hair Hairy Body Slam!" He shouted as he body slammed the two double gangers!

Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler charged at the Bobobo double ganger. The double had moose antlers sprouting out of his afro and was charging! Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler pulled out a rope between them. They stretched the rope out and tripped the charging double ganger! The double ganger fell to the ground hard. Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler were suddenly wearing glasses and business suits. They rode office chairs and started spinning. The spinning caused the rope to wrap around the double ganger tying him up. The two heroes stood the double up and proceeded to punch him and drawn on him. Dawn Patch wrote "I'm Stupid! Dawn Patch should be the main character!" Jelly Jiggler drew a fake mustache.

"Oh wait I just had the best idea ever!" Said Dawn Patch.

He called Jelly Jiggler over and whispered something in his ear. An evil grin spread across the two heroes faces. Jelly Jiggler ran over to the bound double ganger and put a big red bow on it's head making him look like some kind of present.

"Hey Over we have a present for you!" Shouted Dawn Patch pointing to the bound Double Ganger.

Over looked at the bound double ganger with look that was between a evil grin and the smile you would associate with a kid on Christmas Day. The rest of the heroes quickly cleared a patch for Over as he charged forward laughing madly!

"Looks like Christmas came early!" Laughed Over.

The double ganger struggled like made trying to get away from the crazy man with the giant scissors! Over's scissors glowed with a dark purple energy as he slammed them into the double ganger sending it flying! The Bobobo double ganger flew through the air and landed right on top of the Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler double gangers!

"Yeah they did it!" Cheered Beauty.

"Way to go Mr. Bobobo!" Cheered Gaser.

Suddenly the three double gangers turned into ink and returned to Tat. The villain looked at the three tattoos and seemed to be having a conversation with them. He then looked at the heroes and smiled.

"You just got lucky that these tattoos were fresh and weak. They'll become much stronger in a little bit. They just told me an interesting technique they plan to use on you. For the time being I'll use this tattoo to attack." Said Tat as the tattoo of the race car started glowing and become three dimensional.

Tat leaped into the race car and revved the engine.

"Time for a little road rage!" He shouted as the race car speed forward towards the heroes!

Everyone quickly dived out of the way!

"Darn that was close! We must chase after him using our own vehicles!" Shouted Bobobo as he put on an apron and leaped onto a vacuum cleaner and chased after Tat.

"CLEAN FREAK!" Shouted Beauty.

Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler put on sunglasses and leaped into their own vehicles. Dawn Patch jumped into a Convertible. Jelly Jiggler jumped into a little red car with the lucky hankie symbol all over it. The two of them joined the chase.

"Talk about style." Said Master Jelly.

Over leaped onto Torpedo Girl's back and joined the chase. The rest of the heroes quickly found a safe place to watch the chase.

Tat speed of a head. He looked in his rear view mirror and saw the heroes chasing him.

"Ha! You'll never catch me!" He shouted.

He looked and saw an approaching wall.

"Try this on for size!" He shouted as he made a sharp turn and just barely avoided hitting the wall.

"That's nothing!" Shouted Bobobo as he preformed the same maneuver and came even closer to the wall!

"Oh please you got nothing on me the main character!" Shouted Dan Patch as he came at the wall at an incredible speed.

He tried to preform the same maneuver, but broke the gear shift! His eyes widen in horror as he crashed into the wall in a fiery explosion!

"SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULANCE!" Shouted Gaser.

An ambulance appeared and drove up to the crashed wreak. Parallel Bobobo, Professional Patch, and Jelly Jiggler leaped from the ambulance and rushed to the wreak. Parallel Bobobo and Master Jelly fished out Dawn Patch from the wreckage. Dawn Patch was unconscious and covered in lumps! He was careful put on a stretcher. Professional Patch stuck his finger in the air and summoned a lightning bolt to strike Dawn Patch! Dawn Patch shot up bursting out into a weird jig as the lightning coursed through his entire body! After a few minutes he fell to the ground moaning.

"The operation was a complete success." Declared Professional Patch.

"We did it!" Shouted Parallel Bobobo and Master Jelly.

Jelly Jiggler, Over and Torpedo Girl decided not to preform the sharp turn and just simply passed the wall and continued the chase. Jelly Jiggler decided to insult Over and Torpedo Girl.

"Hey nice ride! I bet it gets terrible gas milage!" Laughed Jelly Jiggler.

It took him a second to realize the stupidity of what he just said and who he insulted. Torpedo Girl flew up next to Jelly Jiggler's car. Jelly Jiggler started sweating. Over slashed his scissors and sliced the steering wheel right off the car! Jelly Jiggler starred at the now useless steering wheel. Torpedo Girl reached underneath the car and yanked out the brake lines! Jelly Jiggeler stared in horror.

"Have a nice trip." Said Over with an evil smile as he and Torpedo Girl flew away.

Jelly Jiggler looked up ahead and saw an oncoming wall! He screamed as he crashed into it with a fiery explosion!

"NO JELLY JIGGLER!" Shouted Gaser as he ran towards the wreckage to help his friend.

He moved some wreckage off of Jelly Jiggler and helped him to safety.

"Gaser you saved me!" Gasped Jelly Jiggler.

"Of course I did you one of my best friends." Said Gaser.

The two friends watched as Bobobo, Over, and Torpedo Girl chased after Tat.

"If only I had some fast means of transport then we could catch him!" Said Jelly Jiggler.

Gaser thought for a moment.

"We could use are combo attack." He said.

"That's brilliant Gaser!" Said Jelly Jiggler.

The two of them put on black sunglasses. Jelly Jiggler got on his chest and laid on the ground. Gaser sat on his back.

"United Stinking Jelly Jet Ski!" They shouted as Gaser let out a ton of farts and propelled them forward at great speed!

Soon they caught up with everyone else. They passed Over and Torpedo Girl and then Bobobo! They then rode right next to Tat! The villain gasped in shock and then angrily tried to crash his car into them! Gaser let out some more farts and propelled them to safety. They got in front of Tat and released some more fart gas. Tat eyes began to water and he couldn't see! Then the gas cleared and Tat found himself racing towards a wall! He screamed as he crashed into the wall in a fiery explosion!

Gaser and Jelly Jiggler saw a finish line and crossed it. They high fired one another as Parallel Bobobo wearing a business suit walked up to them caring a gold trophy.

"Congratulations you won the race!" He declared as he gave them the trophy.

Gaser and Jelly Jiggler took the trophy as Softon took a picture of them. Tat stumbled out of the wreckage of his vehicle covered in bruises and some burns.

"That's tears it! It's time for you for to meet your end! Your double gangers will show you their true power! Super Fist of the Tattoo Tattoo Double Ganger!" He shouted.

The tattoos of Bobobo, Dawn Patch, and Jelly Jiggler leaped off his body and became three dimensional. The double gangers of Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler shrunk down and leaped into the double ganger Bobobo's mouth! The double ganger started glowing and transforming!

"Oh no! Those crazy doubles are using fusion! We have no choice, but to use fusion ourselves!" Shouted Bobobo as he Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler started to fuse to.

Soon there were two Bobopatchiggler facing each other! They each drew their happy man swords and charged at one another! Their blades sparked as they hit each other. They shot their eyelashes at one another, but they canceled each other out.

"It's as I feared! They are to evenly matched! They only way for our friends to win is if we lend them some of our powers!" Declared Softon.

Hatenko and Gaser nodded in agreement. Softon launched a beam of green energy, Hatenko threw his key, and Gaser threw a fart at their Bobopatchiggler. As soon as Bobopatchiggler came in contact with these items his appearance changed and he became much stronger. Two giant keys burst from his back like wings, the Goddess Blabs-A-Lot appeared behind him, and yellow gas exited from his rear end.

"You think your little power ups can help you?! Don't make me laugh! Two can plat at this game! Super Fist of the Tattoo Mega Dragon Tattoo!" Shouted Tat as the dragon tattoo flew off his body and became three dimensional!

The dragon let out an enormous blast of fire at Bobopatchiggler! A golden shield of farts surrounded Bobopatchiggler and protected him from the flames! Blabs-A-Lot appeared in front of the dragon and shot her fist out, punching the dragon, and sending it flying! Bobopatchiggler charged forward and slashed his double ganger and the dragon turning them to stone! Bobopatchiggler then turned back to his original forms. Tat just starred at his defeated tattoos in shock and then he burst out laughing!

"You fools can't beat me! I can just summon my tattoos back to my body and send them to attack you again and again!" He laughed as he turned the tattoos back to ink and summoned them back to his body.

"Your right. Will never defeat you this way, but I know one attack that will defeat you! Super Fist Of Robots Tattoo Laser Remover! Shouted Bobobo as he put on some high tech armor, pulled out a laser cannon, and fired!

The laser beam hit Tat and sent him flying! All the tattoos disappeared from his body!  
Tat staggered to his fight and looked at his skin.

"My tattoo! My art. There gone!" He shouted. "I'll just have to make some new ones!" He said as he tried to morph his arm into a tattoo needle, but it wouldn't change!

"I've destroyed your super fist. Now I will show you what real art is!" Declared Bobobo as he cracked his knuckles.

To be continued.


	7. Chapter 7 Crazy Art

Split Hairs  
Chapter 7 Crazy Art  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Bobobo clapped his hands together.

"Super Fist of the Nose Hair Explaining Art!" He shouted as the scenery started to change.

Everybody now found themselves in a beautiful forest.

"What is this?" Asked Tat as he looked around the forest.

"This is lesson one of your art lessons. An artist must understand the peace and beauty of nature." Said Bobobo as a bunch of adorable forest creatures appeared.

The forest animals gathered around Tat and started dancing. Tat just glared at the animals. A bunny walked up to him and stated rubbing itself up against his leg.

"Buzz off!" Shouted Tat as he kicked the bunny and sent it flying away!

The other forest creatures stopped dancing and glared angrily at Tat, who nervously backed away.

"Um nice animals." Said Tat.  
The animals leaped forward and attacked! Squirrels and bunnies sank their teeth into Tat's arms and legs! Birds clawed at his face!

"Somebody call animal control!" Screamed Tat.

"Don't worry we know what to do! Animals calm down when they hear music!" Shouted Bobobo.

He suddenly appeared with Parallel Bobobo, Dawn Patch, and Jelly Jiggler. The four of them were wearing kilts and carrying bagpipes. They started playing the bagpipes. Immediately the animals leaped off of Tat and calmed down.

"Whew! Glad that's over." Said Tat.

He looked over at the animals and his eyes widened in shock. The animals were now wearing kilts and welding swords, clubs, and spears! They viscously jumped on Tat and tied him to a log!

"THE ANIMALS ARE GOING MEDIEVAL!" Shouted Beauty.

Suddenly Over appeared wearing only wearing a kilt. He had blue paint over half his body and face.

"Be free!" He shouted as he grabbed the log Tat was tied to and threw it into a nearby river!

Tat bobbed up to the surface coughing as he floated down the river. He heard a weird sound and looked behind him. He saw a waterfall up ahead!

"Aaaaaaaaaa! Wipe out!" He screamed as he fell down the waterfall.

He came out of the water and swam to shore. He staggered to his feet and found Bobobo standing in front of him.

"Now that your done with your study on nature it's time for your next lesson. An artist must understand the carnage of war." Said Bobobo as he clapped his hands and the scene changed.

Tat found himself standing in a field. He looked around wondering what was going to happen next. Suddenly all the members of Bobobo's team sprang out of the ground wearing army clothes and welding paintball guns! They fired a hail of paint balls at Tat!

He screamed as the balls exploded all over his body and covered him in paint! Bobobo called Dawn Patch and Dengakuman over.

"Time for the heavy artillery. Bring in the air strike!" Commanded Bobobo.

"Yes sir." Said Dawn Patch as he and Dengakuman ran off.

After several minutes Bobobo and his friends ran off. Tat looked around confused. Every part of his body was sore. He suddenly heard a sound of a plane. He looked up in shook to see a large plane flying over his head with Dawn Patch and Dengakuman flying it!

"Time to drop the payload." Said Dawn Patch as he pressed a button.

The bomb bay door opened up and a giant multicolored paintball the size of of bus fell out and towards Tat!

Tat screamed as he tried to run away, but it was to late! The paintball landed on him and exploded into a mighty ball of colors!

The scenery changed back into the room. Tat laid on the ground his body covered head to toe with different colors of paint. He staggered to his feet and glared angrily at Bobobo.

"Congratulations you've just completed your art lesson." Said Bobobo.

"I'll rip you apart with my bare hands!" Roared Tat as he charged forward.

Bobobo shot out his nose hairs and grabbed Tat with them. A giant white canvas appeared behind Bobobo.

"You must be one with your art! Super Fist of the Nose Hair Canvas Crash!" Shouted Bobobo as he slammed Tat's body into the canvas!

Tat left a colorful picture of a man on the canvas. He fell to the ground unconscious. Bobobo duster his hands off. Suddenly he heard some clapping he turned around and saw a holographic image of Split floating above him.

"We'll done! You've beaten Tat! Unfortunately for you he was not one of the Splinter Six." Said Split.

"Then who was he?" Asked Bobobo.

"A powerful assassin. I was going to let him join my group and rename the group the Splinter Seven, but alas you defeated him. Well for all your hard work I'm going to give you a map of Randomtopia it will tell you where all the members of the Splinter Six are. Good luck." Said Split as he vanished.

A map magically appeared in Bobobo's hands.

"Ok the first member of the Splinter Six is at the library." He said.

The group walked out of the tattoo parlor.

To be continued.


	8. Chapter 8 Bard Vs Literature

Split Hairs  
Chapter 8 Bard vs Literature  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Bobobo and the gang exited the tattoo parlor. They found Lambda, Rem, and Not Nice Ice Cream were tying up Sid, Hoods, and Fanny.

"What happened?" Asked Gaser.

"These three jerks tried to destroy us and then enter the tattoo parlor to help their boss destroy you." Explained Lambada.

"We'll thanks for taking care of these guys. We already defeated their boss. He wasn't a member of the Splinter Six, but we did get this map telling us where the Splinter Six are at." Said Bobobo.

"Where's the first one at?" Asked Rem.

"The library." Said Bobobo.

"Wait a minute. Bad Bard ran off to the library." Said Lambda.

"Oh man! We got to go help him!" Said Not Nice Ice Cream.

"Lets quit yanking and getting going!" Shouted Bobobo.

The group nodded and marched off to the library.

At that moment Bad Bard had just arrived at the library. He went inside and saw a stair case. He went up it and found himself in a large room filled with book cases and desk. In the center of the room there was a desk with a man in a cloak that was half black and half white. He wore a mask that was half frowning and half smiling. The man was writing with a quill pin. He looked up as Bad Bard approached.

"I thought I sensed your energy Bad Bard. It's good to see you back my former student." Said the man.

"Yeah I sensed you to. I've come to finally beat you Sensei." Said Bad Bard.

"Is that a fact." Said the man.

"Yes! I've grown much stronger sense last you saw me." Said Bad Bard as he took a fighting stance.

"Oh will see." Said the man.

"Change Word Rope! Fence in and Lock Up!" Shouted Bad Bard as he launched his attack!

A bunch of ropes appeared and captured the figure and a cage dropped on top of him!

"Lightning Attack!" Shouted Bad Bard.

A lighting bolt stuck the caged figure and blew up the cage! A cloud of smoke covered everything in the room. When it cleared there was no sign of the masked man!

"That was quite an attack." Said a voice from behind Bad Bard.

He whirled around and saw the man sitting at another desk just casually writing in a book! Bad Bard just gasped.

"Your skills had indeed improved, but your still no match for me. Your words are strong, but they still lack feeling." Said the man as he finished writing. "Here's how you do it." He said as he showed the inside of the book to Bad Bard.

Bad Bard gasped as he read the pages.

"Bad Bard came at his opponent with great force at his masked opponent with great force. His attacks had no affect on the masked man. Suddenly ropes appeared and wrapped themselves around Bad Bard like serpents. A cage dropped down like the jaws of savage beast! A powerful lightning bolt from the heavens!" Read the masked man aloud.

A bunch of ropes appeared and wrapped themselves around him. A giant cage fell on top of him and then a lightning bolt struck him!

Bad Bard fell to the ground battered and bruised.

"Now you see the true power of words." Said the Masked man.

"I'm not done yet!" Shouted Bad Bard as he staggered to his feet,

"I'm afraid you are. Super Fist of Literature Book Barrage!" Said the figure.

Several books from the book shelfs flew forward and slammed into Bad Bard! He shouted in pain and fell to the ground unconscious. The masked man walked up to the unconscious Bad Bard.

"Thanks for the warm up my student. Now I must deal with Bobobo and his gang." Said the masked man as he prepared for battle.

To be continued.


	9. Chapter 9 Bad Books

Split Hairs  
Chapter 9 Bad Books  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Bobobobo and the gang enter the library. They saw a large arrow pointing to the stairs. They went up they stairs to the next floor. They found Bad Bard lying on the ground a few yards away.

"Bad Bard!" Shouted Lambda as he Rem, and Not Nice Ice Cream rush to Bad Bard's side.

"Isn't this a touching scene. I think I'll write about this in one of my stories." Said a voice from above.

Everybody looked up to see a clocked mask man sitting in a chair and writing at a desk with a quill pin. He was floating in the air.

The man stood up from his desk and floated down to the floor.

"Hello Bobobo I've been waiting for you. I am Booker of the Splinter Six." Said the man as he took off his clock and mask.

Everybody gasped. Booker wore a black suite. His skin was as white as paper and it appeared to have various writing on it. His eyes and hair were as black as ink.

Bobobo cracked his knuckles.

"So our first opponent is some kind of book worm. Not matter. I'm going to beat you up for what you did to Bad Bard!" Said Bobobo.

Bobobo, Dawn Patch, and Jelly Jiggler charged forward!

"Super Fist of Literature Book Barrage!" Said Booker as he pointed his hand at the charging heroes.

A bunch of books flew off the bookcases and at the heroes! Bobobo screamed and quickly grabbed Dawn Patch and Jelly Jiggler and used them as shields!

"I knew one day those over due library books would come back to haunt me!" Shouted Dawn Patch.

"Boss!" Cried Hatenko.

The barrage of books just kept on coming. Bobobo was trapped.

"Wait a minute I have an idea!" He shouted as he dropped a battered Dawn Patch and started reshaping Jelly Jiggler's body.

In a few seconds Jelly Jiggler's body was a different shape.

"Behold my new defense technique. Super Fist of the Nose Hair Jelly Bookcase!" Shouted Bobobo as he waved his new defense technique.

Jelly Jiggler's body had indeed been transformed into a large bookcase, with his head on top of it.

"TALK ABOUT FLEXIBILITY!" Shouted Beauty.

A bunch of books flew towards Bobobo. He used the Jelly Bookcase to catch them all. When the books were gone and the Jelly Bookcase was full, Bobobo hurled it at Booker!

"Here's your books back!" Shouted Bobobo.

Booker dodged out of the way. Bobobo and Dawn Patch charged forward.

"Closing the Book!" Shouted Booker as he slammed his palms down on the ground.

Bobobo and Dawn Patch found themselves standing in the center of a giant opened book. Both sides flew up to close!

"Ah! We were going to be crushed!" Shouted Dawn Patch.

"We got to spring on out of here!" Shouted Bobobo as he used Dawn Patch's body as springboard to jump out of the book before it closed!

Dawn Patch screamed as he was crushed! Bobobo ran at Booker and threw a punch.

"Angry Business Man Punch!" Shouted Bobobo as he punched Booker in the chest while wearing a business suit and carrying a briefcase.

Booker flew back clutching his chest. He looked up at Bobobo and smiled.

"Nice punch. Nice punch now try one of mine. Textbook Punch!" He shouted as his right fist morphed into a hard covered textbook and he threw a punch at Bobobo.

The punch hit Bobobo and sent him rolling.

"Roll with the Punches!" Shouted Bobobo as he appeared wearing a log with a bunch of boxing gloves sticking out of it.

"TALK ABOUT CORNY!" Shouted Beauty.

Bobobo rolled towards Booker and slammed into him!

Booker shouted in pain as he flew to the ground spinning! He staggered to his feet and glared at Bobobo who was back to normal.

"Stack Attack!" He shouted as he slammed both his hands on the ground.

Giant stacks of books appeared and started falling down!

"Lucky I brought my lucky hanky umbrella." Said Jelly Jiggler as he pulled out an umbrella with the lucky hanky symbol on it.

It provided to be very useless as Jelly Jiggler was immediately buried in a pile of books!

"I know what to do!" Shouted Bobobo as he ran towards one of the stack of books and began climbing.

Booker laughed evilly as he made books ran down on Bobobo's allies! Dawn Patch tried to use Dengakuman as a shield, but they both ended up being buried in books!

"Soon you will all be buried alive under mounds of literature!" Laughed Booker.

"Not if I have anything to say about it!" Shouted a voice from above.

Booker looked up to see Bobobo falling from above wearing a rain jacket and rain boots.

"Rainy Day Kick!" Shouted Bobobo as he slammed into Booker!

Booker crashed to the ground. He got up steaming with anger.

"Don't mess with me! Super Fist of literature Quill Pin Sword!" He shouted as he pulled out a quill pin and it transformed into a sword.

Booker charged forward! Bobobo pulled out one of his long nose hairs!

"Nose Hair Sword!" He shouted as he blocked Booker's attack.

The two fighters circled one another slashing their weapons. Bobobo slashed his weapon, but Booker blocked it and hit Bobobo with a Textbook Punch! Bobobo staggered backwards.

"You can't beat me!" Laughed Booker.

"I'm not done yet." Said Bobobo as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of sunglasses.

Booker charged forward! The sunglasses in Bobobo's hand grew as large as a sword.

"Super Fist of the Nose Hair Nose Hair Sword and Sunglasses Equals Double Trouble!" Shouted Bobobo as he swung both his weapons and sent Booker flying!

Booker smashed into a bookcase knocking it down and causing a domino effect with the other bookcase! All the bookcases fell to the ground with a loud thud. Booker staggered to his feet and looked at all the knocked over bookcases. His black eyes turned bright red.

"You fools! Look what you did to my library! I will destroy you all with my most powerful attack!" He shouted.

"Bring it on!" Said Bobobo as he cracked his knuckles.

To be continued.


	10. Chapter 10 Story Time

Split Hairs  
Chapter 10 Story Time  
By: Major144

Disclaimer: I do not own own Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. This is a story just for fun.

Booker slammed both his palms on the ground.

"Super Ultimate Fist of Literature Story Book!" He shouted as the scenery started to change.

Bobobo and the gang found themselves in a forest surrounded by tees, rocks, an old village, and a castle. All the scenery looked three dimensional. Gaser looked behind one of the trees and saw a paper tab holding it up.

"Hey guys I think were in some kind of pop up book." He said.

Everybody looked at the scenery and gasped.

"This is creepy." Shivered Beauty.

"Look up there!" Shouted Softon.

Everybody looked to see Booker siting at a desk and writing on a piece of paper.

"Welcome to my story book. It is a magical place where you will all meet your end. Here I am the author and narrator and you all are just the charters." Said Booker.

"Get down here and fight!" Shouted Bobobo.

"I'm afraid not. Now let me see, should I use as the main character of this story. I should use Bobobo after all his the main charter of this serious." Said Booker.

"Hey! Bobobo is not the main character! I am the main character of this serious, so I should be the main character you write about in this story!" Declared Dawn Patch.

"Hey the anime and the manga are called Bobobo-Bobobobo not Dawn Patch!" Shouted Bobobo.

"We'll this fanfic isn't called Bobobo-Bobobobo, so I can be the main charter in this! I could be the hero!" Shouted Dawn Patch.

The two of them stepped forward as if to fight. Softon and Gaser quickly stepped in.

"That's enough you two! Can't you see Booker is manipulating you, so you'll both destroy each other!" Shouted Softon.

"I don't care! I always wanted to pound this tall afro jerk anyway!" Shouted Dawn Patch.

"Right back at you you little spiky pain in the rear!" Shouted Bobobo.

"Oh wonderful! You can just feel the tension! Why don't you two settle this with a joust? That'll be fun." Said Booker as he wrote something down.

Two motorcycles appeared with horse heads on front. Two jousting lances appeared with metal boxing gloves covered in spikes at the end.

"WEIRD JOUSTING EQUIPMENT APPEARED!" Shouted Beauty.

"You have you weapons and your steeds. Your are both allowed one helper to suit up." Said Booker.

"I choose Hatenko." Said Dawn Patch.

"I choose Jelly Jiggler." Said Bobobo.

"Guys come on there's no need to fight one another!" Shouted Gaser as he turned desperately to Hatenko and Jelly Jiggler. "Please talk some sense into them." He begged.

"Your just freaked out cause Boss is going to destroy Bobobo." Sneered Hatenko.

"Yeah right Bobobo will clobber Dawn Patch." Sneered Jelly Jiggler.

"Oh no! Not you guys to!" Said Gaser.

"We have to stop them!" Shouted Beauty.

"Oh I'm afraid I can't let you. You see I have something special planed for the rest of you." Said Booker as he wrote something down.

Everybody gasped as their clothes changed. Beauty, Softon, and Torpedo Girl looked like royalty. Gaser, Parallel Bobobo, and Professional Patch were dressed up as noble knights with swords. Dengakuman and Master Jelly were dressed up as bandits with swords. Over was dressed in black knight armor welding his scissors sword.

"What's happening?" Asked Beauty.

"Just a little wardrobe change. Now let the story begin." Said Booker.

The scenery changed to a throne room. Softon and Torpedo Girl found themselves siting on some thrones. Beauty stood between them.

"Once upon a time there was a king and queen, who had a beautiful daughter named Beauty. One day Beauty was kidnapped by an evil black night named Over and his two henchmen." Read Booker.

Beauty found herself in a forest, when Over sprang out with Dengakuman and Master Jelly. Over grabbed Beauty.

"I can't control my body!" Shouted Over as he tried to move his body, but it just wouldn't listen.

"Neither can I!" Shouted Master Jelly.

The three of them ran off carrying Beauty.

"The king heard about this and sent a brave prince named Gaser the Gallant. He along with his two knights Parallel Bobobo and Professional Patch set out to rescue Beauty from Over." Read Booker.

The three heroes ran through the woods and found an evil looking fortress. They saw Beauty was tied up at the top of the fortress.

"Run you guys it's a trap!" She shouted.

Denkakuman, Over, and Master Jelly came charging out of the fortress. The two sides began to battle one another. Parallel Bobobo fought against Master Jelly, Professional Patch fought against Denkakuman, and Gaser fought against Over. Neither side had control over the movements of their bodies.

"At this rate will end up slaying one another!" Shouted Gaser as he dodged a swing from Over.

"I'm to cute to be cut to ribbons!" Sobbed Dengakuman as he dodged a swing from Professional Patch.

"This is seriously getting tedious!" Complained Professional Patch.

"Man this stinks! Gaser's a main charter charter in this story plus the main hero. We're just the sidekicks Professional Patch the readers won't care if we get killed off!" Shouted Parallel Bobobo.

"Your right!" Gasped Professional Patch.

"I hope mister Bobobo and Dawn Patch come to their sense otherwise were all doomed." Said Gaser as he blocked another swing from Over.

Elsewhere Bobobo and Dawn Patch were prepping up for the joust.

Dawn Patch wore spiky shoulder pads, sunglasses, black biker gloves, and a T-shirt that read Main Character. He mounted his motorcycle and prepared to charge.

"Go get him Boss!" Shouted Hatenko as he waved a bright orange foam finger around.

Bobobo wore a red cap, biker gloves and a breastplate with #1 painted on it with white paint. He mounted his motorcycle.

"Teach that orange shorter whose boss!" Shouted Jelly Jiggler.

The two combatants revved their engines and began charging screaming war cries!

"I'm the main character!" Shouted Dawn Patch.

"No I am!" Shouted Bobobo.

Back in the real world Bad Bard regained consciousness. He looked around confused. He saw Lambada, Rem, and Not Nice Ice Cream sitting around him.

"What happened? Where's Booker" He asked.

"You were knocked out. Don't worry about Booker Bobobo and the others are fighting though they all just disappeared a few minutes ago." Said Rem.

Bad Bard's eyes widened.

"Oh no he's using that technique. Bobobo and the others don't stand a change." He said as he staggered to his feet.

"Hold on there Your still pretty messed up." Said Lambada.

"I can still walk and fight." Said Bad Bard.

He walked a few feet.

"Open realm of stories." He said as a portal opened up and he disappeared leaving his friends starring in confusion.

Bad Bard found himself floating in the air. He saw Booker at his desk writing. He looked at the scenes below. He saw all the heroes fixing to destroy one another in one way or another. He had to act quickly to save them.

"Lightning Attack!" He shouted.

A lighting bolt hit Booker and sent him flying from his desk and crashing to the ground! Bad Bard ran over and started changing the words in the book.

"Bobobo and Dawn Patch came to their senses, steered away from one another and called off the joust." Read Bad Bard.

He watched as Bobobo and Dawn Patch quickly steered away from one another.

"Man that was close. Lets call this off." Said Dawn Patch.

"Yeah let's do that. Lets go find Booker and beat him up." Said Bobobo.

They returned to their normal clothes. Then they went and picked up Hatenko and Jelly Jiggler and went searching for Booker.

"Everybody who was fighting regained control of their bodies and stopped fighting." Read Bad Bard.

Gaser and Over's groups stopped fight having regained control of their bodies. They untied Beauty and regrouped with Softon and Torpedo Girl.

"Lets go find Booker." Said Gaser.

There was a flash of light and they were back in their normal clothes. Bad Bard appeared before them carrying some paper and a pen.

"Hey guys." He said.

"Hey were you the one who made us stop fighting?" Asked Gaser.

"Yes." Said Bad Bard.

"Thank you." Said Beauty.

"Where's Booker at?" Asked Softon.

"Right here." Said Booker as he appeared in front of the heroes.

He extended his hand and the paper and pins flew out of Bad Bard's hand,

"Nice job...son. You really surprised me with that attack." Said Booker.

"You weren't looking...dad. I took advantage of your distraction and edited your stories." Said Bad Bard.

The heroes gasped and looked confused.

"So Booker is your dad?" Asked Gaser.

"Yes." Said Bad Bard.

"It doesn't matter now. I'll destroy you all with the next words I write!" Shouted Booker as he prepared to write.

Suddenly there was a loud sound of an engine and then Bobobo and Dawn Patch came flying in on their motorcycle with Hatenko and Jelly Jiggler. They had their lances sticking out.

"Here's your jousting equipment back!" Shouted Bobobo as he and Dawn Patch crashed into Booker and sent him flying.

Booker dropped the pen and papers as he went flying. Bad Bard destroyed them with a Lightning Attack. The story world faded and they were back in the library. Booker slammed into the ground with a thud. He staggered to his feet.

"The story is not over!" He shouted.

"Yeah it is you bookworm. Now it's time for a little story of my own. It's time for Bobobo Theater!" Shouted Bobobo.

To be continued.


End file.
